


Forty-Two

by peteor



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Canon Compliant, Friendship, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-25
Updated: 2016-08-25
Packaged: 2018-08-11 01:21:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7869988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peteor/pseuds/peteor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I just can't believe it," Carolina shakes her head, but there's a smile in her voice. "Forty two."</p><p>"Yes, thank you for the reminder that I'm the second oldest person on this entire planet," Washington says dryly. "Really, it's just what I wanted today."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Forty-Two

**Author's Note:**

> listen you can pry 40+ year old agent washington from my cold dead hands but as long as i'm living you cannot take this from me

"Agent Carolina!"

With a sigh, Carolina steps back from the punching bag, still bouncing on the balls of her feet. She looks to the doorway of the weight room and sees Caboose stumbling in, off-balance since he's out of armour and missing a pinkie toe.

"What's the matter, Captain?" Carolina asks, now flat-footed but stretching into a lunge. She glances at her helmet, sitting on top of the nearest bench. "Do you need to talk to Church again?"

"I don't think so..." Caboose mumbles, scratching his head. He's messing up his hair. Carolina notices it's getting long, making a mental note to get Sarge to shave it again. "Church might not know where to find what I need. Even though he's super smart and my best friend."

"And what, exactly, do you need?"

"Candles," Caboose replies brightly, standing up straighter. "It's Agent Washington's birthday today!"

"Is it?" Carolina pauses, voice laced with amusement. "And you're making him a birthday cake?"

"It's a group effort," Caboose says with a hard nod. "Sergeant, Grif, Simmons, and Doc are making the cake, and Tucker and Donut are decorating the cafeteria. And I am in charge of not touching anything and looking for forty-two candles and also yelling SURPRISE!"

Carolina stops. Stands up straight. Stares at Caboose.

"Did you say _forty-two_ candles?"

"Yes," Caboose says solemnly. "We have to have forty-two, or else Agent Washington's age will change when he blows out the candles. Birthday magic is very powerful."

"I'm... sure it is..." Carolina trails off, running a hand through her hair. "You should ask Kimball about the candles, Caboose. I have to go."

"Okay, thank you for your help, Carolina."

"...you're welcome." She replies as Caboose takes off as quick and clumsy as he'd arrived, and then starts putting her armour on.

\--

Washington is standing on a crate, using the megaphone built into his helmet to bark orders at a cluster of Chorus soldiers. They're doing an obstacle course without armour, and Carolina is, as always, shaken by how young they all look.

"Smith! Use your strength and bulk to help your teammates rather than trying to fit places you can't. Palomo! Jensen! Nice teamwork, you two, keep up the good work. Bitters, I _am_ timing you, you can't just wander through it and get to the end eventually. Let's see some energy, everyone!" Washington is yelling as Carolina jumps up onto the crate with him.

When he notices her, he gives a small wave. Carolina hears a click of the megaphone turning off.

"There's been some serious improvement today," Washington says. "It's like they're not giving me trouble for once."

"Probably because the entire planet knows it's your birthday," Carolina replies, shifting her weight, feeling her armour creak as she folds her arms. Washington cocks his head. "They're throwing you a surprise party."

"...who's _they?_ "

"Who do you think?" Epsilon asks with a snort, popping up over Carolina's shoulder. "They tried to enlist my help, but I said no. You're welcome."

"What could you _possibly_ have helped with?" Washington asks dryly. As Epsilon sputters, he addresses Carolina. "They threw me a party last year, too, you know. And the year before. Except last year I made them promise not to throw me any more."

"Clearly they lied," Carolina says with a chuckle. "By the way, are you really forty-two?"

"Yeah." Both Epsilon and Washington reply.

"Wow." Washington says, turning his head to stare at Epsilon, who has taken a small step back. "Really? Every time?"

"What- you were going to answer anyway!"

"Epsilon," Carolina rolls her eyes. "Log off."

With hunched shoulders, Epsilon flickers out. Washington sighs, static-sounding due to his helmet. Carolina takes a step forward and lightly punches Washington's shoulder. "We've known each other for years, but you never told me you were older."

"It's not a big deal, is it?" Washington asks with a shrug. "At this point, I'd really rather not think about it."

"I just can't believe it," Carolina shakes her head, but there's a smile in her voice. "Forty-two."

"Yes, thank you for the reminder that I'm the second oldest person on this entire planet," Washington says dryly. "Really, it's just what I wanted today."

"Oh, don't be a baby," Carolina waves her hand. "At least you've aged well."

Washington makes a choking sound that has Carolina snickering. "Carolina!"

"It's true!" A few Chorus soldiers sing-song from where they've been eavesdropping beneath the crate.

"Get back to work!" Washington snaps after turning on the megaphone, pointing at the obstacle course. Screaming with laughter, the young adults bolt back to the course. Washington sighs and turns the megaphone off again, looking at Carolina. "Why is it that every time one of my friends enters this training room I get laughed at?"

"Because you're a really easy target," Carolina laughs. "Now come on, let's go crash your own surprise party."

Washington takes his helmet off. There's a smile on his face and his eyebrows are raised, giving him visible wrinkles on his forehead and at the corners of his eyes. His hairline is receding and his hair is mostly grey by now, but there's an ageless, mischievous shimmer in his eyes that Carolina remembers from back in Freelancer.

"Yes, let's go do that," Washington replies, before cupping his hands around his mouth and yelling, "Everyone! Dismissed!"


End file.
